Little Blue Pill

Holy bananas, it has been an insanely busy last 2 weeks, I haven’t even had time to write, where does the time go? Whoever preaches stress reduction while trying to conceive was clearly not a social worker 😊.

I finally started my first medication, good ol’ birth control, the medication I spent years and years religiously taking to avoid the exact thing I’m trying to achieve. How ironic. My lady bits decided to shed itself starting on October 10th, so on October 11th I began taking the cute little pill in that cute little blue package. I.freaking.hate.fake.hormones.

By October 15th, I was essentially a living, breathing, monster who was sleep deprived and always hungry. How do these pills have that much of an effect? The first two days taking it were easy-peezy, but then the insomnia set in. I normally consider myself an A+ sleeper, I’m routined to a fault and can fall asleep at the drop of a hat, not on these bad boys I can’t. On the night of the 16th, I woke up every 50-minutes after the clock hit midnight, it was awful. At 3:30am I woke up Nick to see if he was sleeping…of course he was, I had been watching him for the last 3 hours…I also had to tell him I couldn’t sleep, I felt it was important he knew. I’m confident that Nick would classify my habit of waking him up at night one of the most annoying things I do <devil smile>. He told me to go sleep in the guest room, which I did, but of course I was followed by a dog party that was sure to wake the entire neighborhood up if I didn’t let them snuggle. 5:50am quickly rolled around and it was time to get up and seize the day (sarcasm).

I don’t know about the rest of you, but it is incredibly difficult for me to function on anything less then 7-8 hours of sleep. It makes me feel physically ill and I’m essentially worthless. Is this preparation for parenthood?  The next night I took a hefty dose of sleep aid and went to bed by 7pm, by 3am I was tossing and turning again. I’ve forgotten how much I loath fake hormones. I wonder how I took them for so many years.. but then I remember that I was a wild woman and survived on very little sleep and cheap booze each night, truly impressive when I think back about it.

Once I started the birth control I emailed our coordinator to get our official dates determined, ie: lining check ultrasound, progesterone shots, time of FET. Exciting.

I got an email back from her the next day telling me to schedule my lining check on November 24th or 25th, before I even looked at the calendar I knew these dates were probably a Saturday/Sunday, because why wouldn’t they be the days my clinic is closed? Sure enough-they were, excellent, of course, its always something. I had to email back and see if Friday/Monday worked instead. I got an instant email back saying “Friday would be best.” I spent the next 30-minutes on hold with my doctors office only to learn the clinic was closed on November 23rd due to Black Friday. Good God. I called 5 more clinics, all closed. Jesus-is Black Friday a national holiday now?

It look my coordinator from the Czech clinic 3 days to respond to say whether or not Monday 26th would work instead, that was another long waiting game filled with anxiety. I had convinced myself our entire embryo transfer was screwed. Luckily, just like my lovely coworker told me, Monday worked just fine, whoofta.

Next step: try not to hurt anybody, discontinue birth control pills Nov. 9th, and start estrace Nov. 14th!

xo,

Tessa

hormones

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